Robert Oppenheimer

Now I come to write in light and fire
in a language of power we all know,
beyond every letter and poetry
and all the dithering of philosophy,
all the prevarication of politics.
The physicists have known sin, it’s true,
but also the brilliance of a burden
overcome in the ageless mountains,
a foul display that was beyond awesome,
beyond my conscience but still atop it:
in less than a second tens of thousands
turned to piles of boiled organs and black char,
the burnt but still living running for the
cisterns or the boiled, dead-crowded rivers.

News of a flood or an earthquake makes me
think of myself, since the questions tendered
to heaven are now given to me,
and its silence is something like my own:
any remorse is just ridiculous
and any warning is usefully late,
since I’ve already handled God’s fuel.
I cannot keep from swagger, or from mourning:
this knowledge a weight you will never know
and with it a satisfaction, a pride:
numbers and elements resolved into
a thing that worked, but never should again.

Originally published in Poethead, July 2016


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#228 – What Ted Bundy did on July 14, 1974 Human Voices Wake Us

An episode from 5/4/26: Tonight, I read the story of the French journalist Jean-Paul Kauffmann and his capture and three year captivity at the hands of Hezbollah. While held prisoner, he was given many books to read to pass the time, and what I share comes from the spy novelist John le Carré’s memoir, The Pigeon Tunnel: Stories from My Life.Next, I read from Caroline Fraser’s Murderland: Crime and Bloodlust in the Time of Serial Killers. As I say, ever since listening to the audiobook I’ve come to think that there are true crime books, and then there is Fraser’s book: for those who can stomach this kind of material, it is essential. I read the pages describing Ted Bundy’s kidnapping, sexual assault, and murder of Janice Ott and Denise Naslund on the same day—July 14, 1974—from Lake Sammamish State Park in Washington.The best way to support the podcast is by leaving a review on Apple or Spotify, sharing it with others, or sending me a note on what you think. You can also order any of my books: Time and the River: From Columbine to the Invention of Fire, Notes from the Grid, To the House of the Sun, The Lonely Young & the Lonely Old, and Bone Antler Stone. I've also edited a handful of books in the S4N Pocket Poems series. I also have a YouTube channel where I share poems and excerpts from these books, mostly as YouTube shorts.Email me at humanvoiceswakeus1@gmail.com. 
  1. #228 – What Ted Bundy did on July 14, 1974
  2. #227 – The Great Fire of London and the destruction of Jerusalem
  3. #226: The Vitality and terror of cities
  4. #225 – The invention of the wheel, and the power of storytelling
  5. #224: Let's talk about William Blake
  6. #223 – How to write two novels at the same time, with Charles Dickens
  7. #222: Seamus Heaney – 10 Essential Poems
  8. #221: Volcanoes, Plagues & the Childhood of a Kabbalist
  9. #220: The working poor and a so-so murder show
  10. #219: When a paragraph changes your life

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